where we must begin.

to forgive ones' self is
the ultimate in forgiveness
and also probably the hardest
after all... if it were not for
myself, I would not have gotten
into that mess to begin with.

forgive myself for not knowing
how badly it would hurt and
whose lives would be affected.

forgive myself for being.
sometimes it feels that bad.

and sometimes all I want to do
is to wallow in the feel bads.
which is what I'll do until
I'm tired of wallowing.

then I'll get up and forgive myself.
go on about my business,
hopefully to have learned a lesson
not to repeat........